~ A VERY 'DISCONNECTED' DAY ~

oh man, how i hate days like today ~ i'm PMSing (sorry guys), have been on the kids like you'd not believe, have a migraine & soooo much to do that i feel i'm loosing my mind ~ at this time of the year when summer's coming to a close i always find myself a bit sad thinking about the kids going back to school as we love them being home ~ i go through the 'sorry for me' stage that my kids are getting older & we don't have babies anymore (youngest is 3) & no we're NOT getting any more children! ~ the bear cubs are going through this whiny stage (& believe me, that's an understatement) & it's sending me through the roof! ~ i don't know how to discipline on this one very well, because i'm on that like to punich based on the 'crime' so to speak, but with whining, seems i'm at a loss ~ kiara (5) is the worlds biggest whiner (love her to pieces, but it's true) & man can she get going ~ well, her younger sisters (3 & 4) have picked up on this trait & are trying their best to perfect it (& some days are doing better than kiara at it) ~ today we headed off to run some errands ~ we stopped for pizza & while we were there i'd to tell kiara 3 times to keep her feet out of the chair that i was sitting on ~ it was a buffet, so every time i'd go up to get someone some more pizza, i'd come back to her feet in my seat ~ by the end of the meal i was exhausted, she was upset (has a very tender heart) & i felt like trash ~ i then took them all to potty prior to leaving ~ ruby & karleigh went so i'd brit to take them on to the van while kiara went ~ now another one of kiara's traits' taking her time to 'produce' on the potty ~ i waited forever it seemed & she just couldn't go ~ i was frustrated at her 'making me wait', she was frustrated with mommy getting upset & we both at this point felt like trash ~ we then went to walmart where i got the bright idea of letting kiara walk as she's usually always in a cart ~ well, this worked ok for a bit, but then she'd lag, or walk looking down, etc. & it was driving me crazy (didn't take much at this point) so i paid, loaded up everyone & headed off ~ we were to go to the park, but i'd had enough & was heading home which went over really well with the bear cubs ~ ruby at this point decided she'd serenade me all the way home to a song that i really didn't care much for ~ after arriving home, the girls were put in bed where they've taken over an hour nap & are now ready to get up, but i'm so tired i wish now i'd have layed down ~ i'm now at the end of the day thinking i feel like a very full trash can ~ when dustin & brit were younger i was able to give them attention all the time as they were the only 2 we had, but with the 3 girls, i feel as if they get nothing from me ~ i've got no time for them (personally/individual time) & that makes me sad ~ i hug/kiss them in the morning, but it's quite awhile before it's done again as i've got everything to do (laundry, cooking, cleaning, breaking up arguments, mending boo-boo's, running errands, etc.) & i feel they're not getting all they need/deserve ~ sorry for the complaining/whining, but i feel so disconnected ~